Tuesday, October 13, 2009
He held my door?!?!?!?!
When I was younger my grandma would tell me stories of courtship. She would tell me how my grandfather would bring her flowers, and cards, before they even went on their first date. Holding hands, and a kiss on the cheek was “getting lucky”. You now hear stories of how a guy take’s a girl out on a date, pays for everything, and then expects “something in return”. If a guy and a girl do not have sex within the first month or two of their relationship it is considered weird. What has happened from those days to now? Why has the tradition of courting a girl, and valuing her for more than what a guy might get out of her, changed so much in current generations? I believe the answer lies in our media. Everywhere you see images of girls, half naked. This image makes girls look “easy”, thus less effort is put into courtship. I believe this is also occurring because of the increase in the masculinity image of men. Holding a door, or talking sweetly to a girl is now made fun of by other man. If a guy stands up for a female than he is known as being “whipped”. I also contribute this change to the increase in women’s rights. Men see women gaining more power, so they believe they have to work less in earning the respect of women. While I don’t believe in this change, I do believe that women are one of main causes in this change. We let these images continue, with little to no fight. All we can do is one day hope that someone will be brave enough to change the overall image of women.
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I 100% agree. I won't even lie... if im on a date and guy treats me with 100& respect like holding the door and pulling out my chair and things like that my first reactions in my mind is "whats wrong with this guy?" lol. I know thats sad but for some reason i'm always waitng for the other shoe to drop and expect him to do something stupid.
ReplyDeletei agree with you i wish guys were more considerate or maybe were just dating the wrong types of guys. My ex was a good guy and everything except he was like when i get married the girl is going propose to me and i was like i guess were not getting married. I hate that when you go out with a guy they think just cause they paind for everythign they need to get soomething in return. i think day by day society just gets work its the media and the impact in high school and have sex and tapping that and stupid shit like that. But hey theres plenty of fish in the sea.
ReplyDeleteI agree 100% with you. So true, this media portrays the ladies as objects. I mean I am a women and I hold the door because thats just how I was raised. It is looked at as you are weird when you don't give it up in a month, but if they treat you different or pressure you, keep it moving. Ladies need to be treated with more respect, but it is hard because of these rap videos talking us down like hos wearing skimpy crap and we are just a piece! Its BS and I think the women need to stand up for this and build a better image. Ladies don't give it up wait till you feel comfortable and ready!
ReplyDeleteAs well, i agree with this post and the comments one hundred perecent. When a guy does "polite" things it completly throws me off. Back in older days that was the right thing to do. Men would open door, have manners, and in just ll in all be polite and curtious. I beleive when men do that there showing their kind sensitive side. It's nice for a woman to see that a man can be a "mans man" but also an overall sweet man.
ReplyDeleteI agree that a guy should be 100 percent with his feeling upfornt with a girl so the girl dont catch feeling towards the guy. Also the more honest you are the more a female will respect a man for keeping it 100 percent.I think once you give respect you get respect all the way around.
ReplyDeleteIt's unfortunate that the old style traditions have changed. I feel it was a much better way for successful relationships. It was getting to know one another before jumping into the intimate stage of a relationship. And I feel it is why many older couples have managed to stay together and keep the love alive. Yes, because again, they got to know one another through courtship, something many males/females don't know anything about these days. What's wrong with getting to know one another, abstaining from sex, having a platonic relationship? Nothing is wrong with it in my opinion, and maybe we should get back to the old traditions. Maybe it would cut back on many relationships going bad??
ReplyDeleteMen rule the world, simple and plain. The days of courtship are still around. My women still receives flowers and I hold the door open to the house, car, or anywhere we go. The things that are written hear sounds like a maturity level issue. Who uses the word whipped anymore? I think the parents are to blame for a part of this behavior. They are letting their children learn from television instead of teaching the proper manner. Not just the women, both parents. Little girls are learning to accept this behavior because daddy didnt tell them sex on the first date isnt lady like.
ReplyDeleteI do not believe that chivalry is dead. There are many guys that have the courtesy to hold the door for a lady and have respect for women. Women might think that all guys are the same and that they are disrespect women but being attracted to women and having sexual urges is not just a personality problem. Chivalry started back in “the day?” When was that? If you look back in time there are more references to sex than today. Believe it or not. Being naked used to be the best fashion. Sex with multiple partners was normal. Orgies with people in high power were ordered. Sex has been apart of our history and should not be the reason for the lack of chivalry. I personally hold the door for everyone. It is a not being chivalrous, it is simply being respectful and not slamming the door in someone’s face.
ReplyDelete